ball of emotions

first of all i really like how were all writting on here... and its thanks to julia that were back on here again:P it just seems more meaningfull pourring out our emotions on here and being 3 people to do it.. thought id mention that:)
So this weekend swimming went great! i had lamost 2 min left after my time swim and had a good review class:D after swimming went babysitting and oh my god i looove their dog! cant get over how cute he is<3
so last friday after schooli went straight over to Jeremy's.i get there and after taaking forever to change and stuff then we obv head to the basement. then were just in the dark him asking me what i want to do. i did my pont and then kicked back while feet on couch thing and it was cool cuz i was able to do it twice and havent done that in a good month:P so were just chilling there and im bored. hes dead tired cauz he didnt sleep at allt he night befor. he told me that he hada lot of work to do. i frst asked him how hes doing, he said always good, then i asked what his fb status was about ( FML, i saw the coments said: hw? he said no) soim trying to figure out what that was and he didnt want to tell me. i asked a couple times in different ways, tryed to guess but he never answered -.- it really bugs me cause something is obvsiouly going on in his life and he doesnt want to tell me. he shud be able to tell his gf anything, and its been 4 months, so were stalking to get to know eachother so im sure he can tell me some stuff... i dont think its too much to ask for,is it? so at one point me being bored and not wanting towatcha movie and then just makeout, asked if he had any board games, cause i rememberedin the cross room there being some. so i get up and then we fight him holding me back cuzhe didnt want me to go get one.i eventually go and start looking around, he turnedon the light and then im looking at movies and his mom called, he asked me what i want from subways, and me being picky said nothing ( i dont wanna cuase trouble and donno what i like from there, been so long) and hes like u sure ? 10 billion times and im like yeah im not hungry but obv am:P then i keep looking, i lookat games and he just leaves to go in other room im like aight, then i didnt find anything interresing and i organised some of his movies me being a freak and then go back and find him. then im like show me ur italy pics! the ones from months agoand hes like uunnn and im like k wheres ur cat?hes like sleeping, and im like k im going to find him. so i get up look in kitchen and main floor then he comes up and then hes like u relly want him tocome? im like yeah so he gets food out adn cats comes right away:P Jseemed so zombie then:/ tehn him his mom and sister Del all eat im just awks there with cat till Caramel leaves me. hsisisters really nice:) never spent that muhc time with her:) then i asked j if we cud watch the 8count cd of last show cuzi miis it and his ssiter saw it in his hand asking what he was doing with it and im like ohi wanna watch it if u dont mind, shes like yeah sure! so we go downtstais and watch it. i was really into it and funnt enough was being very quuite but saying so much in my head, commeting onthe dnaces:P then he leaves for a bit who knows where and i continue watcing,he gets back and he fell alseep (i thnk) cuz his breathing changed and his arm got like heavy:p then show over so then i get movie and put it in. santa clause 1<3 i was nejoying it so much!!!! then we started making out then mom calls and i was like ehah u can come now, cuz he was going ot have to b soon, then she comes and i go. then im just thinking about Jeremy... like with him, hes not ''crazy'' like me, he doesnt seem to appreciate my ways, he doesnt talk or open up to me, it just seems like all he wants to do is makeout, he cant seem to organise us doing anything but watching movies and kissing in his basement, and like right there it seems like i wana break up with him, but that thought scares me, i dont wanna lose him... its so weird:/ he doesnt seem to care enough about me... and like most of the time if i dont text him he wont text back( even when he takes forefver he still does). he will when its like 5 am and his bored then says he misses me. and like iv realized what a difference it makes when you answer right away! like with alex he asnwers normal, fast so we can talk, but j it will take hours just to say hey how r ya, how was ur day stuff like that, small stuff... and like id ont have nay pics of him, or me adn him... we dont go out, i dont mett his freinds... he doesnt even talk mucha bout them.... arrrrgg
so now i realize that i pretty much wrote all negative things, truth is there are good ones, good thigns i liek about him, (ovs or else i wud break up with ihm)

and now its almost 12 and shcool tmrw but i wanna write more but shud go sleep

-nessa

ps illw rite more later