I hate it when people say don't sink down to their level. I believe that it is completely justifiable to do what the other person does to prove a point. Obviously, there are limits, but if the situation is correct and you can't seem to make a point with words, you need to make a point with action. You don't just sit there and take it when it's killing you inside, you fight back.
Gah, I can't give you guys this advice because you're usually at a loss of words when the other person comes out with a come back -.- and then, you just look like the wrong one because you don't have anything to say. I can completely justify why not talking to your sisters isn't immature, but I don't know if you can yourself.
Please, enlighten me on how else to make a point when you can't get to a person with words? Action is all that is left. Unless, that is, you want the situation to continue as is.
-Eka
That is where our opinions are different. I don't think revenge is a good option. and i don't agree with you saying that ''you're usually at a loss of words when the other person comes out with a come back'' when i feel passionate about something comebacks come fast and ive never had difficulty speaking as you know'' i strongly believe in the saying '' an eye for an eye and the whole world will be blind''
ReplyDeleteIf we take what im going threw with my sisters making them have a taste of there own medicine would just make them say that im immature and that im playing baby games. they won't be feeling the lose i feel when they dont listen to me they will be feeling irritation towards me and they will just think lower of me. I have givin people a taste of there own medicine before with this girl Clodelle who used to bully eyse and me but she didn't stop bullying elyse and me when i bullied her it just made her more angry and meaner to us. In the end every time she would say something hurtful i would look at her like she just said ''elefants can fly'' and it made her feel stupid and no one likes to feel stupid o she left us alone. I have been raised not to think of giving people a taste of there own medicine but that didn't stop me from bullying clodelle. I learnt from doing it that there are better ways of getting someone to leave you alone if you take this example with clodelle.
The idea of giving them a taste of there own medicine is something that has come to my head every time but i chose not to cause i believe it brings on more conflict and pain from my past experiences. Take my mom for example, every time i yell at her to give her taste of her own medicine it just makes her more upset and then she complains to my dad which makes my dad more stressed. if i am nice to my mom she is nice to me and sometimes even choses not to drink because she doesn't want to ruin the fact that her daughter is being nice to her. I find people will respond better if they find that acting in a certain way will make the other person happy or respond to you in a positive way. Take a dog for example. When you are trying to teach a dog to sit, every time they get it right you give them a treat. they remember that they get a treat when they sit when their owner says sit. so the listen to you. I f you hit the dog when they get it wrong you will confuse them cause they don't know what they are supposed to do and they will just stop listening to you cause they don't know if they will be hit. I find its the same with humans.
So instead of getting mad at my sisters when they don't listen to me and then go on to ignoring them, I will be happy and show appreciation when they DO listen to me. When they see how happy it makes me they will want to do it more often cause they care about me and they have seen what it does to me when they don't listen. so thats my opinion. and i came up with my solution because you asked for a better way than by revenge so thanks to you i now how to deal with my sisters.
its like if someone hits you are you gonna hit them back? just cuz they did and u wanna teach them a lesson? no u shud be the better person and just walk away...
ReplyDeleteyou should find others ways, ex someones been spredding shit about you all over school. are you gonna go and do the same thing? and talk to them and deal with it in another way? i find its a question of being mature if you can not sink down to their level.. my opinion
there are more opnions then just wither doing what they are doing or letting it continue-.-
and it doesnt matter what your sisters will think or what they will say, but it does matter what you'll have to do in the process to get them to hear yuo..
when i was little, i thnk i toldu guys this but whatev, this girl Zoe drove me and my friends insane then one day to shut her up i was mean, made her cry and after that, after i sank to her level and lost control i felt bad..
and thats a really good idea julia, i hope that will help them realize it...:)
i believe that yes it wud be easier to do what they did to you abck to them and make them suffer and stuff but by you chosing to find another way is something big of you.. its not always easy but worth it in the end!
g2g eat supper... i can add more about this after:_)
-nessa
I'm not talking about revenge, I like how you guys took it like that..... I'm just a big believer in making a point. You don't necessarily do the same thing they did. You do something much more clever. Being passive is also a way to get your point through, so you could have spared me the paragraphs. It's like being silent for The Vow Of Silence, we are making a point by not speaking... Would that be considered "revenge" on the people who do not let children have right of speech? By making them look bad in a global movement? I was just talking about getting your point through... I feel like I was made out to be the bad guy :p Sinking to their level? What is their level? We've all been on that "level" before... In fact, we're all on the same level... It as if you're saying that you're better than that person that made a mistake. You see, the cycle never ends.
ReplyDeleteGosh, I'm not that evil... I just have a different view of things than most people. Glad I helped to find a solution though...
-Eka
Erika do you really think that i think your evil? did you read the stuff i wrote about you on this blog? i obviously think you are a wonderful person.
ReplyDeleteen résumé i don't think I will not listen to my sisters cause they will react by saying something like ''real mature julia! thats pathetic'' and they will be so concentrated on the fact i'm reacting that way that they won't realise why im doing it.i don't fid that its immature but my sisters will. I think in this case that its not the best way to make a point. thats my opinion for THIS case.
And im sorry erika if you felt like i was making you feel like the bad guy it was not my intent but i should have chosen my words more clearly. And i agree with what you said about how the cycle never ends. when i wrote that paragraph i wasn't atacking you i was attacking the idea of giving people a taste of there own medicine in certain situations.
And i did not think you were talking about revenge. When i first wrote that paragraph i went over it and decided that revenge wasn't the right term so i changed it for 'taste of your own medincine'' I just missed the first and last revenge when i was changing words. So i did NOT think you meant revenge.I did NOT think that wha you meant at ALL! by the way. :)
we will talk about this at school tomorrow! cause im much better with my mouth than with my keyboard:)
-Sekoya
p.S. erika PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE dont feel that i was making you out be evil/the bad guy! i was not thinking THAT at ALL! reread all that stuff i wrote about you to remind you:)
no, i dont consider you the bad guy:p me and julia just happen to have the same opinion on this compared to you,and thats it:)
ReplyDeleteto me, it just depends on how you get your point threw, like i think its very important to do but the way you do it, you ahve to be carefull in my opinion
and yes we've all sunk below us.. but in reality were not always there, like theres us and then when we do what they do just to get a point then were sinking down instead of being more mature about it...
andnot better then the person that made a mistake but better then the person that lost control...
-nessa :)
Haha, I understand that, but I just hate when I'm alone on things, that's all. The kind of feeling that it's me against the world... Yet another of my insecurities. I don't know why it gets to me, but when I feel like something I said is misunderstood & people gang up against what I said, I get this weird feeling... I can't even describe it! And hehe, I know, I know, my temper acted up again :P
ReplyDeleteAnd again Van, you said sinking down to their level... I just explained how I don't find that right. We're all on the same level, every human is capable of doing bad things and therefore, we're equal. You have lost control, I have lost control, Julia has lost control, etc. We're no better than each other. We're all the same in that way. You are never better than anyone... But you can be more wise in your actions. As I said, being passive is a form of making a point and that is what you call "mature" ;)
-Eka
I don't really have an opinion when it comes to that but i think i kinda agree with erika. i just think that are people who chose to make better choices compared to some people. but like erika said we are all capable off making bad choices and good ones.
ReplyDeleteit just all stars when we decide.
dont for get that sinking down to your level is just an expression meaning that you will be doing something as bad as they did. so it just depends on the perspective whether you find it means that you will become as bad as them or if they just chose something different.
its always hard when you are alone on something since it can make you feel alone on everything. it happens to everyone. it happened today to me at rangers but the one that marked me the most was when i was at camp with pathfinders and i thought it would be a good idea to clean up the camp ground cause it was full of garbage but none of them wanted to. and i tried to push my point of how i think it would be the right thing to do but they didn't care and i felt very alone cause even elyse didn't back me up. but then i went home and told the story to my dad and he was so annoyed that they didn't want to clean up. i was happy that i wasn't the only person who thought like this. and i find that it proves that you're no alone. that there are always people who will have the same opinion as you. it was me against 14 other people but then i got home and there was my family and friends who would've backed me up if they were there. i do't know if i explained this story properly but the point was that though you will often feel outnumbered and alone you arn't. but that doesn't stop you from feeling alone on something its just something you should remind yourself.<
i think.
im happy erika that this is all pretty much resolved. if we hadn't gone through this whole conversaton i never would have thought of my own solution so though there was quite a bit of misnderstandment there was still a silver lining! haha
I love you guys!
-Sekoya
Yeah, depends on the perspective :)Woooosh, big paragraph... YAAAY. And yes, it's a very human feeling. I love you too :D
ReplyDelete-Eka